Life of a Working Mom Uncensored.

1. You will feel like an IMPOSTER most days.  
2. You outsource as much as you can, except sex with your husband. 
3. You miss having friends, but often talk to yourself.  
4. You will constantly be asked how you balance it all... and you will shrug it off but really you know you are not balancing it all and DEEP-DOWN you want someone to hug you and say, "I know it's hard. You are going to be ok. Now here's $5 million dollars."
5. You will never be fully certain when your children's homework is due, but you can bet your a** it's tomorrow. 
6. You spend money on your kids like an open cash register because you feel guilty that not only did you not volunteer on the day that Q married U... But you also forgot to bring in the all-organic treat that was gluten free, nut free, chicken free, poison free, urine free, and wrapped individually with a hallmark bow.  
7. You are legitimately shocked that your husband gets a standing ovation for changing a diaper. 
8. You dream about your to-do list.   
9. Your children think you have a short-term memory loss problem and in turn you will get special notices from babysitters, teachers, coaches etc. Later you will find out that your child told them part of your brain is missing and you need lots of REMINDERS.   
11. You love Sunday evenings... 
12. You admire and want to salute ALL moms, because ALL moms never stop working.  And you realize that ALL moms are superheroes and we all hero differently. 

To the mothers who are still trying to figure it out, I feel you.  I am you.